Hello All,

I pray you are all nourishing your bodies, and striving to be the best versions of yourselves that you can be. I hope you exceed all of your potential and create a life you are proud of.

The other day I was scrolling through instagram when I saw a post about doing things because you love your body, rather than because you hate it.

Workout because you lover yourself, not because you hate yourself and wish to change your body.

Nourish your body to love the life you living, not because you hate it.

Wear the bikini because you are involve with the sun on your skin, not because you hate the way you look in it.

The truth is I always have hated my body, but that’s no secret. — I have always done things because I have hated it, and I think that’s part of the reason I still do.

I never gave myself the grace of appreciating my body for more than how it looks. I   pretend I do - because I am trying. But never once have I looked at myself and thought I was worthy of anything equivalent to love, most of the time I think the fact opposite.

I’ve never given myself the grace to accept a kind, decent love. Hell I’ve never given myself the grace to eat without regret.

My 2024 has all been about “changing the narrative,” so maybe it’s time we all try. To try to do things with love, with grace, and with peace of mind - for whatever stage of life you may be in.

To work towards the life we want, not a goal weight we want. I crave so many things out of life, and I fear I am unable to achieve them under the conditions and terms of Hate that I have created for myself.

This narrative that I am nothing unless a small scaled number — and less then nothing for the weight I am at now.

I pray we can give into God and be proud of your body that He touched, a body that He created.

I may never have it all figured out, hell the more I go through this process the more I don’t know. — But I am here rooting for you, trying to figure it out in a way that strives to make us all better.

In a way that makes us hate ourselves and our bodies a little less…

With Love,
Rach